#and to see it come to fruition....i am REALLY interested!!

[mugiwara-lucy]

Wait....so Saturn's out?

And Garling is IN!?

I am VERY excited to see what happens now!!

[vaguely-concerned]

Ever since watching The Wire for the first time, my brain has doggedly kept working away at the Especially the lies of it all, and specifically at how much the structure beneath the different stories Garak tells contributes to the overall meaning of what he’s trying to say. While the contradicting narratives of course expertly obscure the factual circumstances of his getting exiled, using them also allows him to tell aspects and facets of the emotional truth I don’t think he ever could have, if he’d simply told the actual story of what happened. (It’s very Varric-core of him honestly.)

The first story — the ‘oh, you think you know me?’ story — says I have done things that would sicken you if you knew any detail of it. It’s clearly meant to scare Bashir away so he’ll leave him to die shamefully in peace already lol. But it’s also one of his (probably much-needed lbr) little lessons to Julian that are so frequent in the beginning, given while Garak still has some hold on himself — “Don’t be so quick to forgive me if you don’t even know what I’ve done; what would you do if this really were the sum total of what I am?” (And Julian seems to surprise him by going ‘Well, exactly the same thing, because no matter who you are I am a doctor. But I sort of take your point.’)

The second story — the letting the orphans go story — says I have failed to smother my soul in its cradle when it was required of me, and I regret that more than anything I’ve done. To my ears this is the one most shot through with active self-loathing too, which is interesting. He’s officially lost the control he’s been clinging to and it’s about to get ugly. His TL;DR is ‘Sentiment is the greatest weakness of all’, even all the way back here. (Which is the one lesson Julian steadfastly refuses to learn, which I think in turn does some serious rearrangement of Garak’s soul over the course of the show haha. Get uno reversed into the process of loving and being loved without shame asshole.)  This is also where he builds up to admitting to having any sort of need for companionship or closeness at all and — so much worse — that Julian’s role in his life actually has fulfilled some of that need, and he’s DRIPPING with defensive venom over it b/c well I get it Garak vulnerability is scary it can take a person like that. 

(I also feel there’s something honest and forbidden in ‘Suddenly the whole exercise seemed utterly meaningless’. I suspect ‘actually… why the fuck are we even doing this???’ is not a welcome sentiment in an Obsidian Order water cooler environment, no matter what you’re saying it about lmao. The very first seeds of him deconstructing the things he’s been taught about Cardassia and his work might be hinted at here, though they of course take a looong time to come to any real fruition.)   

The third story — the ‘Elim was my best friend’ story — says hey, remember that thing you said once, about how sometimes, you have to be loyal to yourself before you can be loyal to anything else? Well. guess what. I couldn’t even be that lmao. It also furthers that thread of being divided from yourself, split, that having ‘Elim’ as a separate person around in all versions of the story brings in. He’s in control of himself again, but he essentially hands his life and soul over to Julian to decide what should be done with them. 

I’ve done horrible things and it finally caught up with me, I’m getting what I deserve → I let sentiment master me and the fact that I’m too weak to do what’s needed of me shames me more than the evil I’ve done → I fucked up. I betrayed myself and everything I held to, all for nothing, and I have no one to blame for it but myself. But it’s very nice that you’re here anyway, Doctor. (Wow. I didn’t realize quite how isolated and lonely that last one was before right now. The way Tain has shaped him really has just… locked him completely into himself, huh.) We can also see a movement through from a completely professional context in the first story, to an intensely interpersonal and internal context in the last one — even his fake stories spiral in towards intimacy, which I think is what he longs for here even if he can’t quite like. Touch that without the stories as a buffer yet, it’s clearly like touching a hot stove for him to interact with it too directly. 

And you know what I find incredibly interesting the whole way through? Even on his deathbed, where he’s dying from the thing Tain had put in his head, he’s protecting Tain. He puts all the blame for where he is on himself (‘My future was limitless, until I threw it away’), even if he has to employ a strange twisty logic where he’s split himself into two to do it. Don’t get me wrong, Garak has done horrific things all on his own haha, but it’s notable that he almost isolates Tain from that. ‘Tain was the Obsidian Order. Not even the Central Command dared challenge him. And I was his right hand.’ Tain in Garak’s stories is this infallible implacable weirdly distant figure, even now. Indeed, as will make a lot of sense with the revelations further down the line, more than anything it seems the gaze of an abused child desperate for recognition looking up at an idealized (if not in any way nurturing) parent.‘He was retired at that point; he couldn't protect me’, Garak says, as if what he’d need protection from in the first place isn’t Tain himself lmao, as if Tain had no active part in any of this. He never lets blame touch Tain at all. At this stage he would rather consider himself a broken flawed tool than accept that the hands that have wrought and wielded him have ever had any fault in them. AND in the middle of it all, with plausible deniability, on death’s door and knocking meekly to be let in before he must finish the mortifying ordeal of being known and test the even more daunting possibility of being loved, Garak at the same time manages to drop the breadcrumb trail of clues to make it possible for Julian to find Tain if he so chooses and gets in the ‘sons of Tain’ thing too for future dramatic irony purposes. Truly he is the Michelangelo of lying. Every falsehood a multifaceted masterpiece. Elim ‘achieving a state of intertextuality in real life is possible if you work hard and believe in yourself’ Garak. I love him so much. 

I think all of this is why “I forgive you. For whatever it is you did,” works so well, because it too works on a structural level. It’s such a deceptively multilayered response — it has the syntax of a joke, in a way, and it is kind of funny even under the circumstances, but delivered with such earnest warmth and fondness. It’s both recognition and acceptance (forgiveness!). It’s saying ‘I finally understand enough of what you’re trying to tell me beneath and through all that, in whatever way you’re capable of, I see you’ and ‘my answer hasn’t changed (bitch)’. The forgiveness Julian offers here is complete — on principle, and out of personal feeling and empathy (only one of which Garak deigns to respond to during the second story, where he calls it ‘smug Federation sympathy’, placing it more completely on the principle side than it probably is. ‘Dude you’re my friend please don’t just lie down and die in a completely avoidable way on me, who else is going to not only tolerate but actually gleefully enjoy me being annoying as fuck over lunch’ seems to be the subtext that’s a lot harder to acknowledge and invite in for both of them. And yet Tain seems perfectly clear on the fact that Julian is Garak’s friend, which, y’know. Must be fun living with the knowledge that Tain has eyes everywhere looming over you every day haha guess you’d just have to tune that out.) 

Most of all — ’Don’t give up on me now, Doctor’... and he didn’t! He didn’t. Augh. Ow.

[asyisnotok]

Ten Questions for Writers

@mangogreent thanks for the tag!!

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

I started writing in 2022. As of right now, 4! Soon to be 5. I would maybe have more if I didn't lose steam halfway through!

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

My current WC is 49, 519. Hoping to get to at least 100k this year!!

3. what fandoms do you write for?

In the past I have written for the Dream SMP (unfortunately) and Sonic the Hedgehog. Right now though, I'm all about One Piece!! Let's hope that sticks with me, LOL

4. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

Yes! I try to respond to as many as I can. Sometimes it gets daunting! I'm not entirely sure what to say when people ask for updates...

5. have you ever had a fic stolen?

No. Hopefully I never will.

6. have you ever co-written a fic before?

A REALLY long time ago me and my online friend loosely worked on a BNHA fic that I really wanted to see come to fruition, but we lost contact shortly after. It never got posted. Maybe one day I'll find it again...

7. what’s your all-time favourite ship?

ZoLu is my favorite, I've never quite seen a dynamic quite like theirs! I definitely enjoy it but I can also see them as just being platonic as well. One Piece is unique like that.

8. what are your writing strengths?

This one's a bit hard to answer, I think. For me personally I think I'm good at characterizing and coming up with interesting situations for the characters to figure out. I'll have to ask my friends sometime what they think.

9. what are your writing weaknesses?

This is also hard for me to answer - one man's trash is another's treasure! I would have to say I think I am not good at writing characters I don't have a lot of emotional attachment to/don't get much screen time, and while I have the idea I can never quite get it on paper in a way that makes sense.

10. first fandom you wrote for?

The first fandom I ever wrote for was TMNT!! 2012 specifically. I wonder if I'll ever get around to publishing it...

TAGGING:

@maofa @scribbyizback

[lesterwillington]

In Trousers (1979) would make a great movie

Ok, so for those that have never heard of In Trousers, it is a musical originally written in 1979 that acts as a precursor to the much more famous musical Falsettos (though technically Falsettos is two musicals in one and this whole thing is a trilogy but that doesn't really matter for this post). In Trousers is often criticized for being too confusing as it deliberately avoids a linear storyline and leaves many details unexplained or up for interpretation.

In theater, I can understand why people wouldn't like it. Most people only see a show once. So, if they don't "get it", they probably won't like it as much. In Trousers is a musical that begs to be looked at and experienced more than once. You know a medium that is more forgiving to "artsy" and "interpretive" story structure that you can also easily experience more than one time? MOVIES, BABY!

Sure, a lot of people probably still won't be huge fans of it, but I think it could be a genuinely great way of telling this story in a way where people can more easily digest everything. If you miss a detail, you can rewind. If you need a second to process a scene, you can pause. Of course, if you're in a theater then you don't have this luxury, but I don't think it's as big of an issue if you make it interesting enough on a first watch that people want to come back for more. They might not fully understand it, but they can feel the emotions in certain scenes, connect with parts of the characters, you know, that stuff. So, while I adore it in its stage form, I also think it could be just as effective and connect to a wider audience if it was in movie form. If it was successful, you could even make a sequel or two based on the other musicals in the trilogy. It would really just come down to if William Finn (the writer/composer of the trilogy) would approve of it/lend the rights (and also maybe if you can market it well cause I genuinely do not know how you would market this but it's probably fine, it'd be a fairly small movie anyway). Maybe one day it will come to fruition. Maybe it won't Just thought it was a neat idea. (also I frame this as a suggestion but I am actively writing a screenplay, mainly for fun rather than actually wanting to get it made)

[mossy-green-aka-ferrythem]

Can't get over how much Gideon Ofnir revealed before the DLC that a lot of people looked over.

Like. It just makes you realize how reading Miquella as "The Victim" here actually never truly made sense. Because of the fact that Gideon never describes him as such, and even upon seeing that cocoon, he just straight up is like "Miquella fucking scares me, we might want to destroy that cocoon so whatever he planned doesn't come to fruition." Of course, the destruction of the cocoon would have been counterproductive, as we see in the DLC, but it really does show how fearsome Miquella and his abilities are, and how, even before the DLC, he was clearly both revered, and feared, because as gentle as he wished to be, it's more of a violent compassion. The compassion that strips away people's sense of self, and dignity, and just makes them mere pawns to Miquella's aspirations towards Godhood and his drive to make a new age, HIS age. Also. Mohg beforehand was like, never actually written as an "abuser" or "groomer", so I think those should have been clear signs as well.

Really the DLC makes Miquella an infinitely more interesting character than he was with base game information, and clarifies on a lot of points that people were very clearly confused about. Hell, I thought Mohg was nasty, because the circumstances around him and his palace just appear so shocking! However, the in-game text clearly presents him in a certain way that must be recognized and respected... really I am thankful Ansback is a thing because just. He is the best. Unambiguously. Like. Mohg is one of my favorites as well now because of him. Always thought the "Lord of Blood" stuff was some of the coolest ever, and with the clarifications the DLC brought, I can love it all with confidence!

Also. I find it funny that a big reason for them writing these things in this DLC was probably that they realized a lot of people came off with the reading of Mohg as a groomer and were like "There are a lot of things to clarify on in this DLC, but holy shit we HAVE to clarify on that!!!!"

[somerandomdudelmao]

i was writing this all out in the tags of one of your recent updates (part 9 of 'donatello') when i realized i might as well just send it to you directly before i hit tag limit. (i hope you don't mind haha) this recent comic really reminded me of a concept that i've seen in your work that i haven't seen commented on a lot (though i could be wrong.)

casey jr and donatello's relationship as you've portrayed it is interesting in a number of ways. one i've been thinking about recently is the aspect of physical touch, and how you use that to represent the underlying themes/ideas behind their dynamic (and the story as a whole).

in the series, donnie is generally the least physical of his brothers, in that he prefers to be the one to initiate contact. (as a fellow autistic, i relate to this on a visceral level /lighthearted.) however, in your portrayal, this rule bends for casey's sake.

you've been setting up casey to follow in donatello's metaphorical footsteps for a while now, with this coming to fruition (to an extent) in recent storylines.

but going back a bit further. there's this major theme of... i guess i would call it 'responsibility?' that has been weaved through the story from... basically, day one.

in the first comic, his conversation with f!leo following leo's brief foray as a nugget (one of my favorite lines from this series overall is "...and leo-nugget." amazing, genuinely), casey admits to him that it was scary being responsible for someone that could get hurt so easily.

in one of the following chapters, we see the question asked: 'but who is there to save you?' (this chapter being a bit of a microcosm of the theme/story as a whole haha.)

though it was a chapter i had originally assumed was just for funsies and angst opportunities, i now realize i was wrong (though, i don't know exactly how intentional you were being with all of this, so i could be missing the mark here.) it actually sets up his arc rather nicely -- with casey being the one to save donatello when he was injured/knocked unconcious.

now, bringing this all back around to the original intent of this ask: how physical touch is used to represent their narrative dynamic (is that a thing? 'narrative dynamic'? am i just making shit up right now? whatever its fine /rehtorical)

taking everything in account, i want to return to a specific moment that really struck me in the comics leading up to donatello's death. it's the time where the resistance is being attacked, and donnie, despite being sick, goes out and uhhh... extirpates the problem (its always fun to see donnie go apeshit with dangerous weaponry /positive.)

during his dramatic reveal and attack, casey is by his side, clutching onto him not to cling, but to physically support him (at least, that's how i think that moment was supposed to be interpreted? i could be totally wrong here.)

i can't help but feel this is emblematic of the larger themes at play here-- i.e., casey's arc in relation to donatello.

i can't help but find it interesting how donatello, backbone of the resistance--

(despite his soft shell... which is why him no longer wearing his battle shell when he got sick was actually symbolic foreshadowing of-- *sound of gunshots*)

[editors note: i'm gonna stop myself right there, before this goes from ungodly long to "will break your dash and ask box if allowed to continue further"]

-- and certified plot mechanic (oh, so that's why he named it convenient plot-twist serum... finally, the mystery has been solved /joking /lighthearted), who is a very independent/self-sufficient character, allows casey jr to subvert his rules with casual touch. enough so, that when he is so weak that he can barely stand, he trusts casey jr to keep him upright.

out of everyone, he trusts casey.

casey jr, who, at the very beginning of the comic, saved donatello's life, physically carrying him back to the base. and casey jr, the one who, now, has rescued donatello from a fate worse than death, only to once again bring him back to safety.

(...can you tell i'm a little bit obsessed with your comic? lmao)

[also to note those most recent panels: a return to the "norm," with casey clinging to donatello's side, also providing a nice parallel. i know it's because he is very much reunited with his uncle who has been dead for two years, but c'mon. let me have this /joking.)]

anyway, i hope this made sense, and if you did manage to get through my pretentious (and probably somewhat far-fetched) rambles about the "symbolic narrative significance of touch" in a fanwork about the teenage mutant ninja turtles (/lighthearted), may i just say: i am in love with your work, and can only aspire to tell a story as engaging, heartfelt, and clever as the one you have woven.

you are a blessing to this fandom, and i am so excited to see where you go with this story.

I have to say that I didn't specifically do the mental planning for all of this. Most of this theme is simply because I do what I feel will be right. It's more of an intuitive desire than a prescribed plan, so it was pretty surprising to me to see this thought actually being formulated haha

Thank you:>

[shade-of-vermillion]

Gonna be honest. The DLC ending isn’t as out of left field as people think it is. (Spoilers under cut)

Yes, even the Radahn part. There is some evidence for it in the base game. Specifically, we know Miquella had or has ties to the Carian Royal family. We can infer that from two pieces of evidence, 1) Loretta’s presence in the Haligtree and 2) the description for the Miquellan knight’s sword. In the case of Loretta, you could of course make the argument that she sought him out on her own while looking for a place for the albinaurics, but with the sword, I think to go as far as to model a sword intended to be given to his knights after Caria’s implies he had contact with or at least a great deal of respect for someone from that house.

I’ve seen people in the past posit this as evidence he and Ranni were in cahoots but frankly I don’t believe their goals are aligned even in the slightest. Ranni after all believes that the best path forward is to reject godhood utterly and leave the lands between so that mortals can decide their fates on their own, whereas Miquella in the base game has literally been growing his own Erdtree, a new system to replace the old rather than a rejection of the system altogether.

I know there has also been a lot of upset about how Godwyn may have made more sense as his lord consort, however I believe Radahn was chosen specifically as a way to save Godwyn. In the base game through exploring Castle Sol and looking through the descriptions for the gear of mausoleum knights we discover the possibility of returning soulless demigods to life via an eclipse and find out that Miquella was working towards making one happen to bring Godwyn back. Radahn is shown as capable of binding the stars to prevent Ranni’s destiny from coming to fruition. He could probably force the moon into position in front of the sun if he wanted. If Miquella’s goal really was to restore Godwyn with an eclipse it makes a lot of sense that he would tap Radahn to force one to happen.

As for the Mohg thing, come on now. Gideon gives you the recipe for the bewitching branch the second you tell him you visited Mohgwyn palace. If it was just because Miquella was there he could’ve given us sleep pots or sleep arrows or maybe one of the rings of light spells. But no, he gives us the bewitching branch. How the hell else am I supposed to take that.

Honestly I also don’t think this ruins Miquella’s writing. I think it just makes him more interesting in the long run. He does have good intentions, but pursuing godhood requires dirtying your hands. I also don’t think this undermines his connection to Malenia or his drive to see both of them healed. I just think he’s more complex than people thought he was at first brush.

[beronicalongcon]

MY TOP 10 RIVERDALE MOMENTS

In honor of the most gorgeous beast of a show to ever air being put in the ground tonight, here are my top 10 Riverdale moments. It was pretty impossible to make this list because I had to leave out so many beautiful things like that time Archie got forged, that time Cheryl was Queen of the Bees, and that time he was looking for the girl next door, but instead he found me.

10. JUGHEAD MEETS THE RAT KING

Sweaty, unhinged Loser-Jughead hallucinates his literary agent appearing to him as a Dark God of sewer rats. In a bid to save his life, he offers to be the Rat King's personal storyteller, like a Riverdalien Scheherazade. Betty appears to him and guides him out of the underworld and it's revealed that he was in the hospital for RABIES, which is made one billion percent funnier by the fact that rabies is 99% fatal. This made me so happy I was literally riding the high for weeks.

9. Archie boxes Hiram in the secret speakeast while Veronica sings "Daddy Lessons" by Beyonce.

This is just one of those great Riverdale musical moments - cutting between the blood spatter and bulging muscles of Archie and Hiram's furious machismo coming to fruition and Veronica dressed in gold singing about her terrible and vital love for her insane mob boss Daddykins.

8. PSYCHO KILLER PROM NIGHT

This whole plotline is great because 1. the auteur making big, clunky comic book caricatures of the main cast and having them relive their traumas through the mode of film with all the edges sanded off is metatastic, 2. Jellybean is the coolest middle schooler ever, and 3. Psycho Killer playing at Prom Night while they all dance around Mr. Honey's corpse is just objectively great television.

7. THE FOOTBALL WAR OF UZBEKISTAN

"Haha football war" shut up this is one of the most artistically cohesive and interesting sequences in the entire series. It lays bare the twisted knot of dream logic and aestheticism that governs Riverdale's universe. "Why do all the visual cues point to Archie fighting in WWI if Riverdale is set in 2021?" Because WWI was the period where America most successfully fetishized the IMAGE and AESTHETIC of young men going to war as a MASCULINE IDEAL. "Why are they fighting on a football field?" Because football is another heavily fetishized mode of expressing American masculinity and violence as heroic. "Why is Jughead there?" Because Archie loves Jughead.

6. BERONICA KISS IN OUTER SPACE

I may not like season 7 but my URL is 'beronicalongcon', and the way this episode reminds us how Betty and Veronica are historically positioned as diametrically opposed forces vying over Archie's love before bringing them together and letting them truly see each other is really nice. Also they kiss in space to symbolize that the world of the narrative by definition cannot allow women to connect independent of men, the only way they can truly be together is by inventing a new universe that is able to hold them.

This got long so I am making another one.

[selkiewife]

Helaena's "Where would I go?" question. The way she looks so... interested in a way? I can't decide if it's like "Where would I go? I already know the future so I don't know where I could possibly go?" OR... maybe this is the first time someone has presented her with another option... and she is actually totally intrigued. It seems as though she receives kind of waking dreams or visions a lot and can't quite separate herself from the dreaming/real life. I think? Tell me if I'm wrong or if you have another interpretation. She tells Aemond this essentially- even if you killed me it wouldn't change anything. But maybe it would?

I have always said that I LOVE the prophecy inclusion in House of the Dragon because it brings up so many interesting questions. And I think what is the most interesting is the way people REACT to the prophecy- and that seems to be a huge thing in the asoiaf novels as well. You might have a dream or prophecy but interpret it wrong. You may have a dream or prophecy and interpret it "correctly" but go about achieving it "wrong." I'm putting it in quotes because I realize it's much more nuanced than I am describing it. I personally love the idea that the Targaryens are having "correct" dreams about the long night but are trying to solve the problem in the "wrong" way. Like yes, uniting Westeros may seem like the right idea (and I honestly can't blame them for thinking that) but it ultimately becomes a really distracting, brutal, self annihilating side quest? Maybe? Helaena, unlike most of the other dreamers or characters motivated by prophecy in asoiaf, doesn't seem to impose her own ideas or actions onto the prophetic visions she receives. She kind of just receives the visions and she doesn't say- "Oh, here is how I can help this prophecy come to fruition" (like Macbeth or Rhaenyra and now Daemon) or "here is how I can prevent this prophesy from happening" (like Oedipus and Daenys- Daenys being more successful than Oedipus of course lol.) Alicent has also seemed to travel her own "I must prevent the "prophecy" (from Otto) of my sons' death from happening- and yet everything she does to prevent it unfortunately ends up leading to her sons' death...

But Helaena doesn't seem moved to action by her prophetic visions. I think it's because she sees that as futile. It upsets her greatly that she can't prevent the tragedies (like her son's murder.) But! At the same time, she is in a culture that kind of reinforces this idea of passive acceptance. "I can't prevent the evil that I have seen is coming" pairs with Otto's non prophecy real world pragmatism of "this is the way the world is- either play the ugly game or die."

And yet, for the first time in perhaps her life, Alicent asks Helaena if she'd like to go somewhere else- to break script- to break her destined path. And I feel like Helaena seems to consider it for a moment. I think it would be an interesting exploration if Helaena is genuinely asking, "Could I? Could I do this? Could I leave the path that is laid out for me?" I also think it's interesting (and I really love) that it is Alicent that presents this possibility- who has always been such a symbol of walking the path that has been laid out for them. Helaena says later in the episode, "It's all a story. And you're but one part in it. You know your part." But can the part players improvise? Can they go off script? Can they wander off the path? Can they collaborate with the story? Can they change the story?

The finale left me with a lot of these questions. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. I'm just really curious and wish for more exploration of these themes.

[intrulogical]

remus isn't dumb; a sanders sides essay

i've been struggling to make a cohesive post about this because i feel like most of what i want to say boils down to the same underlying message which is: remus isn't dumb.

i feel like a good chunk of this fandom understands what i mean, at least to a surface level point. but even then, i think too much of the fandom still misinterprets remus' character in a way that, they seem to understand different traits of his, but the way they execute it is still way off from what we see in canon.

(rest of the essay under the cut!)

for example, the biggest thing i see people get wrong would be the way they write remus "lol random" personality. it's true that remus tends to say whatever he wants at any given moment. but, the problem here is that people tend to think remus as random in function. i have no better way to describe this succinctly, so to expound: while remus tends to make left-field jokes a lot, he is shown to be incredibly deliberate, cunning, committed, and intelligent in very subtle ways.

truth is, remus is very goal-oriented, and when he has a goal, oh he strives for that goal. so far, i'm writing this with the last 5 years episode being the most recent substantial episode, so i can't really 100% say all my assumptions of remus are true. actually, i think the upcoming season finale will be the missing link when it comes to providing us with the whole picture of who remus is.

as for now, i just have to stick with my theory of; remus, as a side of thomas' heavily connected to insecurities and mental health issues, intends to shed light on the "darker" sides of thomas because he believes them to be beneficial. throughout dwit, we see remus continuously bolster the idea that his contributions are useful for thomas. this continues in wtit, but with the extra layer of remus wanting logan as well to be in touch with the darker parts of himself to get thomas in line.

it is also heavily implied that remus is well in on whatever janus' plan is to get thomas to be a.) more aware of his mental health issues, and b.) to get thomas to break out of his catholic black and white thinking. in forbidden fruit, it's janus who’s seen permitting remus to present himself to thomas. bigger evidence though, as i've mentioned in the previous paragraph, is the way remus seems to deliberately want logan to manifest his anger against thomas.

of course, we can always say that remus taunted logan "just for fun", but i feel like too much of what happened in wtit seem to point to remus having deeper reasons. for example, wtit exhibits how bad thomas' mental health is to the point that he gets irrationally angry at nico for not replying to his texts. this proves how thomas has been neglecting his mental health, and with the way patton, virgil, and roman held onto toxic selfless ideologies for the longest time, thomas would still, naturally, be lost on what to do. he would even seem to deny how bad things have gotten, especially with the way he acts like nothing bad is happening when he goes to his date with nico.

why am i emphasizing this? well, it's because something i find interesting about remus' character is how deeply cognizant he is of thomas' problems. what i mean by this is, no other side can call out thomas' issues more than remus can. i wrote an essay about this before if you want to check this out, but tldr: remus, as intrusive thoughts, is the most perceptive out of all the sides when it comes to calling out insecurities or problems. we see this come to fruition in wtit when all of the traps he laid out for thomas involved nico in some capacity.

while you can interpret his character as evil for preying on others’ insecurities, i think it's important to acknowledge that, in a sea of people who tend to refuse to talk about their issues, remus is the main guy who constantly brings them to the table. whether remus' intentions are good or not, there's no denying that remus' importance as a side lies in the fact that he serves as a mental health alarm clock for thomas. with the way none of the sides want to communicate with each other, we need someone like remus to cut the bullshit and say things as it is. 

again, we don't really know if he wants to help thomas. but i would like to emphasize that, yes, remus is not dumb. he does not merely make lewd jokes and calls it a day. he has the long-term goal of making everyone talk about more "taboo" topics with each other, and this includes talking about personal grievances the sides tend to suppress or refuse to talk about. lewd jokes are just part of the process.

i think this goal of his is also incredibly visible with the way remus treated logan in wtit. wtit is my favorite sanders sides episode because there's just so much to analyze between remus and logan, but you can check my other essays in regards to that. the main thing i wanted to point out is that what remus says to logan in the end, "woowee logan, now you're speaking my language. but who do you really want to scream that at?", proves he is more deliberate and cunning than he seems.

a lovely bit of analysis my friend orb (@orbmanson7) provided is that remus didn't just pop up in wtit to intervene with thomas' plans. he was there to intervene with logan's. if you've seen my other essays, i've talked about how logan as a side has been dwindling in terms of self-confidence and assertion. this has left a big problem of thomas being more reliant on his emotions, making him ignore the suggestions given by logan that may help with thomas' mental health in the long run. this is not to villainize thomas' mental health crisis, btw. all i want to say is that, remus recognizes how logan's self-restriction is doing no good and deliberately wants to push logan to become more assertive and angry.

that is why he says logan is speaking his language. he wants logan to recognize the merit in the way remus grabs thomas' attention. he wants logan to be like him and cause more havoc. again, we never know how much remus genuinely wants to help thomas, but we know that remus wants everyone to be more exposed to "taboo" things, and this includes logan being more in touch with his angrier side.

besides that, i'd like to mention how, in general, remus tends to be very committed to his goals more than how the fandom typically portrays him? in dwit, remus' main goal was to disturb thomas and the other sides. it's kind of just an introduction to his character. we're not sure if it's part of a bigger plan he and janus devised to get thomas to take care of himself better, but it is a possibility. the only time he gets too random is when logan begins picking apart his arguments. there we see remus only results to super left-field, continuous off-tangent jokes when he's desperate or placed in a lose-lose situation.

another, in wtit, we see how remus understands how to make very long, complicated traps. i think it's a perfect encapsulation of his personality, actually! throughout the episode, we see him make these multilayered traps with a ton of props and preparation just so he can bother thomas with it. it shows that remus is actually less impulsive-oriented as he seems. he even created a schedule he showed to logan detailing everything he wanted to do that day. again, deliberate! he is deliberate and very smart!

other thing i'd like to harken back to is the idea that he's in cahoots with the other dark sides to execute some Big Plan to break thomas out of his black and white thinking. while we don't know how orange acts like yet, we're Very familiar with janus by this point and we can see how long-drawn janus' plan of acceptance is. he's, again, sorry to use the word so many times, very deliberate. i don't even think his plan ends with svs.r, because it does seem like remus is well in on this plan too. in the 5 years video, he also seems to know more than thomas on what else is to come for the future of sanders sides, which implies he has some plans up his sleeve that no one else knows about. like i said, janus has the goal to break thomas out of his black and white thinking. and so far from what we've seen from remus, he also wants the same!

an important factor of remus' character besides his deliberateness is his general need to subvert what "goodness" means. "good and bad are all made up nonsense," he sings in forbidden fruit. throughout dwit he continuously criticizes everything thomas thinks is good or acceptable. in the 5 years video, he argues about how there's no "correct way of sitting". i think this also proves how remus is important as a side because, while not every single one of his beliefs are morally acceptable, he is still able to pick morality apart in a way the other sides are unable to. also, i just think this proves his character as just. generally smart? he's able to pick apart the status quo and moral philosophies, of course he's smart.

just to pick up on a previous point, remus is scarily perceptive. i mentioned this earlier with how remus is able to pick logan apart, but i'd like to add onto it more since i think a lot of people underestimate how crazily perceptive he is. for one, despite not being too close with a bunch of the other sides, he seems to be able to read their insecurities and play them against them really well. we see it in the way he uses virgil's insecurities of being an ex-dark side against him. we see it in the way he picks on patton and thomas' morality crisis against them. we see it in the way roman describes remus as someone being able to show him things he doesn't like about himself. and most importantly, we see it in the way remus constantly reaps the fact that logan isn't listened to to the point that logan snaps. as intrusive thoughts, remus' job is to see what deepest darkest secrets thomas and the sides suppress and use it against them.

at the moment, we don't really know if remus has any weaknesses, although wtit sort of implies that he himself is also quite irritated by the fact that thomas doesn't listen to him. he does a good way of hiding, though, how much of that problem is genuinely affecting him. it makes me think he's also smart in the way he's able to hide his vulnerabilities and true intentions from the other side. he's silly and goofy and lewd and because of that, everyone thinks he's harmless. the sides think he's unserious, and so does the fandom. but deep down, remus really isn't that stupid. 

and LASTLY, when beta reading this essay, orb also mentioned to me about how remus possesses cognitive flexibility in a way roman doesn’t. this isn’t meant to discredit roman of course, but i think it’s important to mention that remus is the side with the least amount of restrictions when it comes to creative liberties. orb mentioned to me how remus is able to connect concepts easily in a way roman doesn’t because remus doesn’t operate under the same self-restrictive mindset. while this obviously would help thomas become more innovative as a creative, i think it’s also important to recognize how much thomas kind of needs it in general. much of the latter half of the series shows thomas dealing with restrictions, especially when it comes to doing good. it would be great benefit for thomas to be able to listen to a side who generally wants to Have a Good Time, and doesn’t abide by rules imposed onto them.

and yes that is my essay on remus 100/10 best character and is not dumb at all. very excited to see him in the finale and i hope y’all’s get your characterizations straight because i need me some good fics 

[percheduphere]

honestly I'm more at a loss when people say sylki is canon. I am...very confused by what people mean by that. they were never anything romantic together? I honestly feel like I've missed a whole season of the show when that gets said. that's not from a shipping standpoint; that's from nothing happening that'd make them "canon"

like, to ship sylki is still to ship something that isn't and didn't become "canon". it's still wanting something that didn't happen between them

like, even if sylvie was an intended "love interest" (was she? even? on the basis of her being a woman that loki connects with?), I don't call that alone a romantic relationship between them being "canon". Like, if elizabeth bennet and mr darcy never became anything, they're not "canon". that's just something that could have been but wasn't.

they were never actually anything?

LET'S TALK ABOUT "CANON" & BISEXUAL REPRESENTATION, THE SERIES' MIDPOINT & THE THEME OF BETRAYAL, AND THE SUBJECTIVITY OF ROMANCE

I've been sitting on this inbox comment/ask for a long time because I wanted to make sure I respond in a way that feels productive, kind, and doesn't step on other fans' joy. Having said that, as a Lokius shipper, I think it's really important for Lokius shippers and Sylki shippers to unite on at least one subject and that's positive bisexual representation. This isn't meant to be a harsh reply--I understand what the anon is saying from their point of view--but I also want to delineate between canon and personal interpretation/taste.

I also want to note that it's unfair to disavow Mobius and Sylvie's impact on Loki, Loki's impact on each of them as a result of his individual relationships with them, and thus the impact Mobius and Sylvie have on one another separate from Loki. Doing so really halves the overall richness of the story, and taking this into account is why my metas are so annoyingly long. This one, in particular, is a mess but hopefully I've managed to wrangle it into some kind of coherence that addresses the anon ask that is respectful to Sylki. Fear not, Lokius shippers, I discuss Lokius in this post, too. But first, let's talk about canon and bisexual representation ...

CANON AND BISEXUAL REPRESENTATION

Canon is often defined as: 1.) what is actually written in text (as opposed to subtext), AND 2.) what the creator(s) verbally confirm.

I've said before and I'll keep repeating: the most important aspect of art is art's relationship with the reader/viewer. Individual interpretation is what escalates a medium to a deeply personal and, at times, spiritual level. Art is supposed to make us think and feel. We're supposed to interact with it and do with it what we will. This is particularly important when we consider that much of consumable art is hampered by the demands of capitalism. Fan-interpretation democratizes what people without power want to see and hear, whereas canon (especially mass media canon) often self-censures to sell to the widest audience.

From the creators' standpoint, Sylvie has always been intended to be Loki's romantic interest, and Loki was always intended to have romantic feelings for her. This is what the creators tell us. Whether or not one likes Sylvie and Loki together is subjective.

As for the text, the plot between Loki and Sylvie has the markers of a romance, albeit one that doesn't come into full fruition. By full fruition, I mean a happy ending with each character affirming one's love for the other and committing to being together. Now, a relationship doesn't have to be successful or reciprocal to be considered romantic. Heck, it can be absolutely toxic and still be romantic. Whether or not the plot is convincing in its execution of romance, however, is also subjective.

What romance requires is: 1.) at least one of the characters desiring the other, and 2.) at least one of the characters willing to sacrifice for the other. Sacrifices don't have to be big, either. They can be small and cumulative.

Canonically, Loki fulfills both of these romantic requirements for Sylvie. (More on Sylvie below).

Subtextually (that is, not canon as defined above), Loki and Mobius fulfill both of these requirements for one another.

I'm gonna soap box for the next two paragraphs, so you can skip over this if that's not your jam. Both romances, canonical and subtextual, can exist concurrently without erasing the existence of the other. Even if Loki and Mobius had miraculously become canon in S2 (it's Disney, this never would have happened but let's explore the hypothetical), that doesn't erase Loki's former romance with Sylvie in S1. To erase that history is bisexual erasure, which isn't okay. Likewise, quashing the importance of queer subtext in order to "kill the other ship" isn't okay either, as it reinforces optical heteronormative romance in mass media and is also a form of bisexual erasure.

What's more important than either ship "winning" is the positive portrayal of a bisexual character. This means a character who demonstrates genuine love and devotion to people of more than one gender. If we accept the canon AND the subtext (we don't have to like it; Sylki's not my cup of tea personally, but I accept it as real), Loki fulfills positive bisexual representation, however restrained that representation may be. The social goal is to get to the point where a media juggernaut like Disney allows its franchise characters to experience relationships with more than one gender canonically and positively. We're not there yet and I'll probably be dead before Disney ever gets there, but Loki can be seen as a historical stepping stone distinct from Aziraphale and Crowley (Good Omens) and Steve Bonnet and Edward Teach (Our Flag Means Death).

(NOTE: Polyamory is a whole separate subject matter, which I'm won't get into here.)

ON SYLVIE

There's fan dispute over Sylvie's interest in Loki. I've previously written meta on Sylvie's sexuality and how she responds to Loki's romantic advances here. In S1, while she starts off frustrated, I think Sylvie slowly develops interest and was cautiously hopeful that she and Loki could figure out their futures together. Loki has been consistent about wanting to be with Sylvie and supporting her up until the necessary plot conflict of the series midpoint (S1E6; the S1 finale). This midpoint is the root cause for why Loki and Sylvie's relationship becomes strained. Again, this doesn't mean that the romance never existed--the plotpoints are there--but it does mean Loki's character development got in the way.

So let's talk about the series' midpoint and the interplay of Mobius, Loki, and Sylvie's mutual impact. The three are so deeply entangled that it's worth untangling their cause and effect on one another.

THE SERIES' MIDPOINT & THE THEME OF BETRAYAL

I keep stressing in my other metas that the series' midpoint (S1E6) is the most critical. Structurally, midpoints are where the story turns. Midpoints occur on multiple scales: at the episode level (typically in acts 3 or 5, depending on how the screenwriter divides their screenplay), at the season level, and at the series level. Midpoints are what provide the overall narrative and character arcs with movement.

As a whole, there are 3 key midpoints in the entire series:

1.) S1E2/E3 - When Loki betrays Mobius for Sylvie (midpoint of S1)

2.) S1E6 - When Loki betrays Sylvie for the "bigger picture" (midpoint of the whole series)

3.) S2E3/E4 - When it's revealed HWR betrayed Renslayer; Victory Timely is brought into the mix, and Sylvie reluctantly joins the TVA (midpoint of S2)

There is another betrayal that runs near-concurrently with #2, which is Mobius's betrayal of Renslayer (it begins in S1E4 and continues into the S1 finale). Thematically, we can take Loki's betrayal of Sylvie and Mobius's betrayal of Renslayer as mirrors of one another because these are the only betrayals that are motivated by good rather than selfishness. The selfish betrayals of #1 and #3 bookend betrayal #2 to highlight the beginning Loki's readiness to become a hero in S1E6. Where S1 focuses on Loki exploring who he is, S2 focuses on the hero Loki will become. S1E6 therefore serves as Loki's turn, his launching point to get to where he lands in S2E6. The story is really well-structured!

The poetic irony is that Loki's S1E6 betrayal was not an act of villainy, but an act of character growth.

There is plot set-up for Loki's betrayal of Sylvie, and that set-up is 2-pronged: 1.) from Sylvie's end, her misinterpretation of Loki's intentions, and 2.) from Mobius's end, the provision of unconditional friendship. Building up to these prongs are S1E1 - S1E3, in which Loki's self-interest and impulsivity are emphasized. S1E4 pivots Loki from self-interest and impulsivity to consideration for others and caution. Sylvie did not bear witness to Loki and Mobius's interactions in S1E1-S1E2 and S1E4 in the time loop chamber. She has no context for why Loki would hesitate killing HWR. I'll discuss this more under "Prong 2".

PRONG 1: SYLVIE'S MISINTERPRETATION

In the scene below (S1E5), Sylvie makes an assumption about what Loki wants and Loki admits via subtext that ruling a timeline actually won't make him happy.

Sylvie smiles in response, implying she understands what Loki means, however Loki often speaks in double-meanings (he cannot be trusted) and Sylvie has doubts (she cannot trust). From Sylvie's point-of-view, Loki has discussed the desire to rule with her 3 times (writers' magic 3s again). Above is the third. The previous 2 are:

1.) In their first confrontation in S1E2, when Loki offers Sylvie the opportunity to be his lieutenant. (Can't find the gif of this. Grr ...)

2.) On Lamentis (S1E3) in the scene below:

By S1E6, Loki has no interest in rule.

He's honest when he says he's worried about the greater ramifications of killing HWR. Sylvie doesn't believe him. The question is how did Loki arrive at this point in his character arc? Why slow down now? Why worry about the consequences now?

The answer is in S1E4.

PRONG 2: MOBIUS'S UNCONDITIONAL FRIENDSHIP

It's established in S1E1 that Mobius knows Loki better than Loki knows himself and consequently better than Sylvie knows Loki. A lot of Mobius-haters despise Mobius's cold confrontational tactics but it is those same tactics that force Loki to self-reflect. And to be clear, Mobius uses cruelty in S1E1 because 2012 Loki would not believe in, let alone listen to, softness and compassion. Cruelty is a language 2012 Loki understands, therefore Mobius communicates with him on that level to get him to listen and start thinking about the answers to the hard questions.

Not exactly the gif I wanted, but close enough. In this scene, Mobius wonders why Loki, who "has so much range", wants a throne. He then asks Loki, what's next? The implication of these questions is that Mobius knows Loki will never be satisfied. He knows, deep down, a throne is a poor substitute for what Loki really wants: love, acceptance, and companionship.

Mobius's tone is mocking, his note that Loki has a wide range is complimentary, and the question is serious. Further, and this important, Mobius gives Loki respect in conjunction with his cruelty, his compliments, and his seriousness by acknowledging Loki's intelligence ("I am smart"; "I know") and his potential to be more than a villain ("That's not how I see it"). Understandably, this strange, dizzying mix of seemingly contradictory truths puts Loki off-balance.

Their tenuous allyship becomes a friendship in Mobius's eyes near the end of S1E2. Mobius is practically squeeing about Loki's multiple breakthroughs and how well they work together to Renslayer:

And Loki genuinely looks excited to help Mobius. Look at that fist-pump. Mobius doesn't see it, he's ahead of Loki, so his enthusiasm isn't an act. The seeds of mutual trust (rather than doubt) have been planted.

Unfortunately, Loki's poor impulse control and need to hedge his bets out of self-interest lead him to betraying Mobius. Both Sylvie and Mobius take Loki's betrayals poorly.

The key difference is that Mobius cannot resist the desire to trust Loki, to want to be his friend. This desire creates Mobius's doubt in Renslayer, which in turn leads to his betrayal of her.

Forgiveness isn't easy. It requires the ability to accept disagreements and another person's shortcomings. It requires good will, faith, and a willingness to move on. It requires compromise and, at times, letting go entirely.

Mobius torturing Loki with the Sif memory loop was awful. His personal hurt is directly tied to the below admission, which informs Loki what Mobius thought of their relationship:

And that revelation startles him. It forces him to evaluate his actions that led to Mobius saying such a thing (impulsivity; self-interest). Loki, who doesn't want to be alone, desires Mobius's friendship.

So when Mobius returns to Loki with an olive branch ...

Loki offers Mobius an olive branch of his own by affirming the friendship Mobius believed in but felt betrayed by.

Thus, Loki and Mobius accept each other's olive branches. They forgive each other and repair their relationship from there. This is critical thematically because Loki and Mobius each extend olive branches to Sylvie and Renslayer respectively, both of whom reject those olive branches more than once. Sylvie and Renslayer represent opposite ends of the chaos versus order ideology, for which neither is willing to compromise. Loki and Mobius also start out at opposite ends before meeting in the middle.

Sylvie unfortunately does not know anything about Loki's interactions with Mobius and how those interactions have impacted Loki's motivations. She doesn't know that Loki wants to "slow down and think about this" because the last time he acted on impulse, it turned out he almost threw Mobius's friendship out the window without realizing he had his friendship in the first place.

For her, the seeds of doubt have already been planted: Loki betrayed the TVA to pursue her, Loki expressed shock at Sylvie's desire to "walk away" rather than taking advantage of the "ultimate power vacuum" once the TVA is destroyed, he expresses the desire to rule 3 times. Therefore, it's perfectly reasonable for Sylvie to assume Loki would betray her for power even though she had hopes to the contrary. Romantic tragedy? Absolutely. Believable? Depends on who you ask and what your personal taste is.

There must be some kind of sentiment on Sylvie's part, however, because she chooses not to kill Loki. Instead, she kisses him goodbye and throws him through a time door.

Mobius's friendship is therefore the catalyst for everything that unravels between Loki and Sylvie in S1E6 (the series' midpoint). I think it's safe to interpret Sylvie's tearing into Mobius in S2E4 as not only due to being in the TVA and having all her traumas brought to the surface, but also due to experiencing jealousy. This level of anger matches Mobius's outrage about Sylvie in S1E4! Note, however, that this interpretation of Sylvie's interaction with Mobius is subtext. Subtext goes many ways!

THE SUBJECTIVITY OF ROMANCE

Are Loki and Sylvie a believable romance? It depends on your taste.

A fictional couple's overall successful reception by the audience (which is rarely if ever 100%) is contingent on a few things:

1.) Character development

2.) Story execution

3.) Chemistry between the actors

Reception and interpretation of the above are all subjective. In addition to these elements, another important factor is couple trope. Depending on your preference, some tropes might be nope while others are yum. You might even like most tropes but the actor chemistry, character development, and/or plot are just not doing it for you.

Loki and Mobius follow the tropes of:

Opposites attract/Complementary set

Sunshine and cynic

Enemies to allies to friends to lovers

Sherlock and Watson

Slow burn

Ride or Die

Loki and Sylvie, on the other hand, follow the tropes of:

Exceptionally similar but with key differences/Matching Set

BAMF duo

Enemies to allies to lovers

Bonnie and Clyde

Fast and passionate

Ride or Die

Loki and Sylvie's romantic dynamic may be compared to the following couples in other media:

Batman and Catwoman

Jack Sparrow and Angelica Teach

Benedict and Beatrice

If you notice, they all have very similar personality traits. They also fight and fight a LOT. It's part of their charm and can add to their chemistry.

Personally, I didn't feel any chemistry between Loki and Sylvie, I didn't feel like there was enough warmth between them, and I really wanted Loki to be loved by someone who makes an effort to understand him rather understanding his core traits off the bat by being the same entity. Loki and Mobius hit all the right story beats for me. Tom and Owen's chemistry as actors is remarkable. I'm also a sucker for ball of sunshine and cynic dynamics.

But that's just me. That doesn't mean I don't see what the creators tried to do with Loki and Sylvie in terms of plot, character development, and couple tropes. Some people felt chemistry between Tom and Sophia, others (like me) didn't. Whatever the case, the canon exists and the romantic tropes are there. I just feel the subtextual romance between Loki and Mobius is stronger and that, again, is my subjective judgment.

[laughhardrunfastbekindsblog]

Having recently finished an (overly-lengthy) analysis of Tech's development and now working on one for Wrecker, I've been thinking a lot about each of the main characters' arcs. So here, y'all get a summary:

To start off with, it seems each of the titular characters' arcs (with the exception of Omega) revolved around answering one of the main themes of the show, a theme that affects all of the clones:

“We were born and raised to be soldiers of the Republic. It is our entire identity, culture, and purpose. So what do we do when the Republic is now called an Empire, the war we were born for is over, and we face the possibility of being replaced? What are we if we are not soldiers?”

The first question of “What do we do when the Republic is now called an Empire?” is answered quickly: Crosshair joins the Empire, the others don’t.

The second question – “What are we if we are not soldiers, can we be anything else?” – takes longer to answer, because even though Hunter, Echo, Tech, and Wrecker decide within one episode that they won’t be soldiers to the Empire, they continue acting as soldiers and functioning as a military unit (why wouldn’t they, it is literally all they know). Even building relationships with Omega and protecting/caring for her involves them taking an adolescent clone with no military training and teaching her how to be a soldier working with a squad. Whether they are soldiers for a cause, soldiers who have left a cause (deserters), or soldiers for hire (mercenaries), most members of Clone Force 99 take a long time to consider other roles, purposes, and identities beyond being a soldier.

- Crosshair: his arc is the most obvious as he goes from clinging so tightly to his identity as a soldier that he is willing to walk away from his family and throw in with the Empire, to eventually discarding the soldier life completely after the Empire abuses his loyalty, and ends retiring with his family on Pabu. His answer to the second question seems to be "I'm still figuring that out, but I know I don't need or want to be a soldier anymore; and more importantly I know who deserves my loyalty, and that's enough."

- Hunter: he feels he needs to remain a soldier/mercenary to protect his family from the Empire (and from blackmail), and he has a difficult time letting go of that role even as other options open up to him. It takes the loss of one of his brothers to convince Hunter to give up the soldier life “for good”… until he gets dragged back into it, but he stays fighting as a soldier only long enough to recover what he can of his family, ensure their safety, and peripherally help another brother (Echo) as needed. His answer to the question seems to be "People keep telling me there are more options than being a soldier, but there's never any time to really explore these options or let down my guard. Oh, look, here comes another disaster." It isn't until the end of the show, when he finally has a chance to breathe, that he says they, like the other clones, can finally be "Whatever we want."

- Echo: he deliberately chooses to stay in the fight and continues soldiering, but for a bigger cause he believes in and one that aligns with his ideals. His answer is essentially “I guess I could be something else, but I want to continue being a soldier. It's how I can best help ALL my brothers."

- Tech: he remains a soldier in order to help his family, but as he begins to see history, culture, traditions, and life existing well beyond the war he was born for, he is one of the first to openly express an interest in pursuing possibilities outside of the soldier expectations (stay on Pabu, help the community rebuild, spend time with Phee, etc.) His arc is cut short before these possibilities can come to full fruition, but he did have an arc in that he answered the question with “I am a soldier, AND I can be more.”

- Wrecker: he has no problem sticking with the soldier-like roles, though he also has no difficulty integrating into other communities and helping them out - so long as there is action involved. He'll stay in one place if that's what his family decides to do, though they don't officially decide to do it until Tech dies... And it's only thereafter, when Wrecker is left the last man standing to keep Hunter from going off the deep end, that Wrecker begins to not only advise Hunter, but also advise caution. His goals shift from action/thrill seeking and helping his family, to being more selective in order to help his family. His answer to the question is "Being a soldier was fun, but now I see and understand the risks of staying in the fight. I don't care if I'm a soldier or not, I'm open to new things, as long as I'm with my family and they are safe."

While Omega is the exception in that she doesn't necessarily answer the same questions her brothers have, but - like most coming-of-age stories - she still eventually has to answer the question of who/what she wants to be, so:

- Omega's arc takes her from being a clone with no military training (who doesn't even know what dirt is), raised by brothers who for most of their lives had no choice but to be soldiers... to a young woman who has been trained by the best, has the option of staying out of the fight, and chooses for herself to become a soldier.

[another-day]

its time for to review something i’ve been waiting for for four years now

finally, i am very happy to say, we have EPISODE IN REVIEW for the fresh new episode of SEASON TWO EPISODE 15!!!!

spoilers ahead if you haven’t watched it already!!!!

i feel like i knew where this episode was going from the start, but we’ll get there ;]

first off; taco was such an interesting character in this episode, and i’m really glad they took the time to flesh her out!!!

obviously yeah she has a whole song about her desires and all, but even through dialogue and interactions she is taken care of very well and i really appreciate that!!

her desires are still humanised even though she’s the anti-hero of the season, and i think it really shows you that she was a contestant too at one point, and she had a negative experience with the show. does this mean i don’t think she was totally manipulating the final four? not in the slightest, but its still peculiar.

this time skip had me a little confused, because from paintbrush’s statement in regard to lightbulb “missing a lot”, one can assume that season three already ended

i’m hoping this’ll be explained at some point but i’m just confused!!!

i could essentially guarantee she was going to be eliminated from this line alone, probably by her own choice. lightbulb has a tendency to fixate somewhat on things she finds important in sentences, so i knew from here.

LOOOOOK AT HIIIIIM HE’S HERE!!!!

okay but for real; this was a masterful song, and i absolutely adored all of the musical progressions and just EVERYTHING. Rheagan Rizio’s vocals were amazing and the song was totally captivating, i love it.

this scene was incredibly interesting to me, this being the moment after suitcase says she genuinely befriended balloon and didn’t do it out of spite.

its like taco forgets people have different desires, and almost believes them to reason things the same way she does, because she knows that if she were in suitcase’s situation at that point that she would’ve done it out of spite, SO INTERESTING!!!!

this was one of my favourite scenes by far, because it brings to light an underlying storyline that has been there since the beginning

knife has been trying to be a better person throughout season two, and this is where that kind of comes crashing down for him. its something so rarely brought up, but bringing it into fruition like this was a fantastic choice, especially when his beliefs of “getting better” are immediately brought down, because his “better” may not be what actually is “better” overall.

ough,,,,,, season two episode twelve parallel save me i love these two so much i had to include it

i had a feeling after episode 14 that lightbulb would be out in this episode, because she was mentally at the weakest point she’d ever been in, but now i can see how much mental strength it must’ve taken to leave behind something that has been such a constant in her life for something that she found mattered to her much more.

she’s such a wonderful character, and i know people will be upset, but she’ll be far happier like this, and that’s already made very clear in later scenes

and to finish, there he is again !!!!

i’m so happy they’re canonically friends too!!!

but overall, taco’s development has been so interesting this episode. i really think she’s starting to fully understand what she wants now, and i suppose now i can only hope she’ll actually talk to them about it next episode

i freaked when i saw this

its not the fact that mephone has his name saved only as steve cobs, but the fact that he has it saved at all.

i understand that this could just be an embedded contact from creation, but i still feel that cobs wouldn’t just put his name in as such, and that mephone wouldn’t have just deleted it by his own accord.

also the fact that COBS is calling HIM. steve cobs has been shown to show little to no interest in mephone following season one, rather focusing on his newer phone models, so what triggered this? if the timeskip is correct, then i’d like to assume its the prime shimmer that influenced him to call mephone. i dunno why, but its a thought yknow!!!

but in conclusion, this was a spectacular episode. a friend of mine screen recorded the entirety of taco’s song so i am very excited to listen to that again, and i hope to see you all next time oooooon… episode in review!!!!

[rozaceous]

tcba ch 26 outline

sasuke pov. once again, draft is an outline, and this was written before i wrote out ch 24, so there might be some redundancies

also includes how i was going to end the ch

getting back to ame post-summit

pein/konan: you stirred things up but failed in your mission. not a single dead kage between you?

sasuke: if you want something done the way you want, do it yourself

interrupted w tobi on how they're bolstering akatsuki's numbers

zetsu's recruited kabuto so uh, hey senpai lol

and wow the tension between konan+pein and tobito can be cut w a knife

deidara and kisame out doing their thing to catch the other jinchuuriki, have used the summit as distraction to sneak in, they aren't back yet

so a clear 3 factions

pein and konan treat mariko and sasuke as tobito's toadies since they were recruited on his insistence, kabuto is assoc w mariko

but kabuto is there for the eye of the moon plan to come to fruition, make a clone army or something something w the use of edo tensei

mariko keeping mum on that one since she's not sure how much of kabuto being here is him thinking that it sounds like a genuinely good idea that he's committed to following through, and how much is him being along for the ride

sasuke can hardly call him a betrayer or whatever since he joined the same cause they did, but still feels gross

also he knows that tobito is 'madara' and the continued deception is irritating

so 'wtf is the eye of the moon plan' has to be explained, itachi explained it some but he wants to hear it form tobito besides not really being able to say that itachi told them already since they supposedly killed him

prev encounter w just pein and konan acting as directive was focused on the tyranny of the great nations and the flaws of shinobi society, so even tho he's aware that this is a thing it still feels extremely out of left field

so obviously this is bullshit and the skepticism will not stay out of his voice

and if it's tobi explaining this all, then it's super natural for him to then turn to konan and pein and "y'all good with this?" and immediately prod at the inherent tension dividing them, esp since deidara and kisame aren't there to buffer

and man it's like farting in a quiet room: pein and konan politely ignoring that there is this divide in the leadership and tobito and zetsu not wanting to exacerbate anything

tobito to sasuke: this is the only way to assure that there is peace

sasuke: by shoving everyone into a genjutsu against their will and giving them all their wildest dreams as an illusion? until what, everyone dies in the real world? until they starve to death? or is it only that chakra users would be sustained by the combined chakra of the jinchuuriki? or is that chakra store used up just by catching everyone in the genjutsu to begin with? are people's comatose bodies just getting eaten by wild animals or what's up with this logistically?

basically this is a load of unsubstantiated waffle, sasuke was taught genjutsu by orochimaru, who tho lacking in a doujutsu was premier at them and understood them on a technical level that's beyond virtually everyone else

also sasuke: your plan is shit, the whimsical thinking of children, and i'm not interested in a pretense of peace, i'm interested in justice

and mariko is totally down with this as a distinction (lowkey is doing an internal fistpump bc what a cool line bro and what a worthwhile philosophical delineation)

this is less internal than she thinks, can't quite keep a straight face

tobito maybe asking if mariko has a similar modus operandi

mariko: sasuke and i are a team

"i see"

sasuke: "does this mean we can stop this entire farce now, tobi" maybe that he's been looking for him, why was itachi so committed to him having the mangekyo/implication that he would need it

pein laughing, like "he's got you there"

kabuto is just ready to bust out the popcorn, now this is intrigue

so woo woo the dark chuckle, ahaha yes i am madara, your forebear

mariko: hm doubt (but also wtf i guess we're going w confrontation after all, have to destabilize this dude as much as i can if i want any hope of living thru the aftermath, but i guess also let's set him against konan and pein)

which sort of is sasuke's play, if there's a divide in intent here then it's prime time to force this confrontation since there's a chance of getting pein and konan to either stand down or join in, and deidara and kisame aren't present to act as other variables to control (kabuto is a non-issue in his brain no matter which way he falls lmao)

and this would catch konan and pein's attention bc they have been operating under the assumption that he is madara, or at least not otherwise caring

so mariko whips out: you're uchiha obito, aren't you

sasuke wondering how they went from 'obito's right eye never reclaimed/his body never found' to 'obito lived and is evil now' but willing to go along w it bc he trusts her instincts/she's rarely wrong in his experience/even if she is wrong, she's saying it for a purpose

can shun sense the zetsu movement? if yes then it's helpful if he's present for this whole discussion/debrief

confrontation

pein and konan staying out of it/focus is on containment (wouldn't let zetsu run off, but not fighting unless they're attacked first)

mariko+kabuto fighting zetsu vs sasuke fighting obito

attempts to slice and dice him fall thru bc he just reforms

mariko: fire it is!

sasuke struggling w the intangibility combo'd w the (essentially) teleportation, mariko needing more juice

they switch off

and ofc kabuto and sasuke look at each other like 'ugh, this guy again' but needs must or whatever

sasuke able to get his fire jutsu hot enough to scorch the plant goo? or lightning something, idk

how do they even kill him in canon

after sufficient chakra expenditure, sasuke released orochimaru

mariko had been trying to save chakra in order to use kotoamatsukami and letting sasuke be the heavy hitter

was planning to whammy obito but has to use it on orochimaru?

the rest of team7 arrives amidst this chaos

ofc adding kakashi to this particular psychological bender of obito's is always a good idea

mariko: shit, bc she'd been meaning to take care of obito (reform or otherwise) so shishou wouldn't have to

basically things conclude so that:

pein and konan go on their merry way ruling ame, disillusioned, talk no jutsu'd, whatever

obito reformed??? whatever. basically sasuke takes his remaining sharingan as a way of saying he's not worthy of having it (clan shit) and kakashi essentially defects from konoha to be his babysitter/seeing eye dog

orochimaru dead

zetsu dead

kabuto affirmed to stick w mariko (she may do some move to save him? debatable)

naruto not going back to konoha, but also feels estranged from his teammates (except sai lol). he still doesn't get why mariko did what she did/can't really grapple w her killing ppl, and he doesn't quite jive w sasumari's plan to destabilize the shinobi village system (tho it's a bit more subtle than that? idk). i think he ends up as sort of a nomad and hanging out w gaara a lot

sasumari 4evah lol

have no idea what i'm doing to tie in ROOT stuff, but there's a thought there?

need to regroup w team hebi and itachi

itachi and kisame can have their bromance reunion lol

idk abt deidara, hm

how i was going to end the ch:

Mariko leans into him and Sasuke's knees give way, the two of them toppling to the ground in a messy sprawl, exhausted. His whole body is shaking with it. She pushes herself off of him just enough so that she's not crushing him, and the laugh she breathes out trembles. A cut on her cheek is still bleeding. "So," she says. "What's next?"

[maybeiwasjustjade]

The Tragedy that is the Vanserra family

*I just want to preface this by saying that I’m well aware that this might be a controversial opinion. My issue is simply with how that particular pairing was written, because clearly not a lot of thought was put into it when SJM changed canon to fit this pairing in. This was also not written with the intention of victim blaming. Only that this plot genuinely sucks ass because it makes everyone out as uglier than need be.

For such minor characters (sans Lucien, and Eris to an extent), the dynamics SJM has blessed us with paints such an interesting family coated in absolute tragedy. It also doesn’t help that almost all of it was seen through Feyre’s pov—who’s not exactly reliable nor capable of introspection most times.

All we know so far of Beron and his relationship with his children amounts to:

Aside from Helion and Rhysand, Beron’s the only HL that was active during the war 500 years ago.

He abuses his wife, though when it started is still ???

He routinely tortures Eris, and more than likely all his remaining children

He LOATHES Lucien

And it’s so easy to paint Beron as this needlessly cruel, manipulative 2D bastard who only exists to cause pain and carnage over everyone that breathes near him. The male tortures his children and sentenced one of them to death for falling in love with someone ‘lesser’—that alone makes him the worst male to come out of acotar by a landslide.

But there’s an art to Beron’s cruelty that SJM could have fun with. Routinely siccing and manipulating his children against each other, forever ensuring that they’d be too busy fighting and hating each other over him so that they’d be unable to overthrow him. And maybe he does have his reasons. Maybe he thinks that this is the only way possible to raise an heir that would be ruthless and merciless enough to overthrow him and destroy his competitors—probably the same thing Beron did to claim his throne. And if the children are too busy with each other to go after him…all the better.

Show them no compassion. Torture all the disobedience out of them to make them strong. Pit them against each other to please him. Heinous tactics, but evidently it works when Eris and Lucien are the results of it.

But this dynamic only works if that was who Beron is, and how he was raised to be. I don’t suppose we’ll ever really know, not unless a large chunk of Lucien’s future storyline revolves around his roots in Autumn. But knowing sjm and how dirty she did Spring, Lucien’s arc will be about Day.

But back to Beron and the LoA:

Curious how the LoA is still nameless, but SJM purposely and canonically provided a timeline to show how much of a poor victim the LoA is. I want to make it clear that I am not condoning the abuse the LoA is facing from Beron. I don’t think anyone deserves to be abused or tortured the way Berons does his family, nor will anything justify it.

However, I am side-eyeing the way she WROTE Helion and LoA’s affair. I think what she little she wrote yet specifically gave painted them both as absolute fucking morons.

Canonically, we have no idea if Beron knows without doubt that Lucien isn’t his. Hell, we have no proof that he even knew about Helion at all; only that Helion certainly believes so, and what Feyre perceives as the truth. And that truth is ugly.

My opinion is that for the story to work, Beron can’t have known about Helion specifically. An affair perhaps, but not specifically who. Why? Because I wouldn’t doubt Beron would have killed Helion for it the moment he found out. Helion wasn’t High Lord until <50 years pre-Acotar. If Beron wanted Helion dead for having an affair with his wife, I doubt even the previous HL would have stopped Beron from lobbing of Helion’s head. Now assuming Beron knew about the affair specifically, but not about Lucien, I can see canon coming to fruition.

The only issue is Lucien’s features. He needs to look very, very similar to the LoA and not at all Helion. If Beron knew it was Helion, he’d be paying double attention on Lucien’s features to see who sired him. But say he doesn’t care who did it, only that it did. Lucien was screwed from the getgo as a possible affair baby. But that’s hardly the biggest issue with how the affair was written.

According to Helion’s recount of his affair, it started during the war when he rescued the LoA. Sure, rumor has it they met before her marriage, but it wasn’t until then that it became an actual affair. And it lasted decades. We don’t know how old Lucien is. Most have guessed that he can’t be older than ~400 at series starts. Following the timeline provided by Helion, there’s about 130 years age gap between Eris and Lucien, and five sons between. The LoA had at least two more kids born before the war started, leaving three sans Lucien to be born after.

See where I’m going with this?

If the affair only ended because Beron found out, preferably before Lucien was born or he’d be dead at birth, then on-off or no, that affair lasted a century. My question is: did Beron begin tormenting his wife before or after he found out about the affair? And was he already torturing his children before he found out, or was that punishment for what their mother did?

If Beron only began abusing and assaulting the LoA after Helion, then there’s a chance he only started hurting his sons around that time too. It also begs the question on whether or not Helion sired more than one Vanserra child. Even if the answer was no, it’s not like Beron would believe the LoA. Not after she cuckolded him. So he hurts her as punishment, doubling that pain by going after all their children too.

Lucien especially, for being mama’s favorite. I doubt Beron ever had to do much to encourage the torment Lucien faced from his brothers. He never had to; she did it to him all on her own by loving him best. And in a household where everything is a competition and love a weakness, Lucien was weakest by being the most loved. Oh, how they must’ve loathed him for it. His birth was the reason their lives became a living hell. A mother that perhaps loved them, but not enough if she outright favored the youngest, knowing his existence was their punishment.

But that’s the kinder story, if you can believe it. A female who was never happy, who found happiness outside her wedded husband, and was punished for it terribly. Her cold husband turned cruel bastard, who punished her for the crime of finding joy outside of him and their children. She didn’t know this was going to be her future.

Yet, the alternative is so much worse.

Because it implies that Beron already was a cruel and abusive bastard, who already hurt his wife and children immensely, and the LoA went and had an affair anyway. I can’t blame her for wanting to escape from Beron. Perhaps she was actually happy with Helion. But she did it knowing that the punishment would be so much worse if Beron found out, and he did.

Helion couldn’t have protected her. Claiming Lucien as his son would’ve been a death sentence to both from Beron’s wrath. And with a century long affair, there was no proof that Lucien was the only one that wasn’t Beron’s child. Not unless most of the Vanserras look like their father more, and we don’t even know that because they have no names or features described. And even then, the LoA was lucky that Lucien’s skin tone and features favored her instead.

I don’t care that a woman cheated on her abusive husband repeatedly. You do you, and all that. I care that the LoA is written as knowing what an absolute monster her husband already was to their living children, and clearly not thinking of what he’d do to them if she’s caught. This is Beron—he could’ve killed all their children as punishment. The man tortures his son bloody—I wouldn’t put it past him to kill them all and start fresh. She put them in so much danger by having Lucien.

I don’t like the way Helion knows what a bastard Beron is, yet not caring when he had a century long affair with a HL’s wife, knowing that she might be killed if found out. And he would be powerless to stop it.

I don’t like how neither of them even considered that she might’ve gotten pregnant from their affair, especially knowing that the LoA already had SIX CHILDREN.

I hate how their affair is going to be spun into some kind of romance of the ages, mates who were forcibly separated by a monster, when in reality it’s more like the love story of two morons who didn’t spare a single braincell to actually think before going back to each other often enough to have a whole ass CHILD.

Jfc, SJM definitely didn’t think through enough when she decided to add this into the story. Too many plot holes, and not enough sense to justify the absolute stupidity of cuckolding a High Lord with someone who couldn’t even protect her if they were caught. She wanted drama but spared no thought to logic, per usual.

[sgiandubh]

I’m reading the new Clanlands book. I was hoping it would be a fun read like the first one, no narrative. I’ve now read two different passages in the book where Sam talks about running into a woman he finds attractive whether it’s a hotel patron, hotel staff, or shop worker, including this passage about Valentines Day. He hoped to ask the woman making his smoothie on a date and instead ended up alone in his hotel room on Valentine’s Day dreaming about a romantic night in his hotel room with the fantasy date that never came to fruition.

I wish for once we shippers could get a win instead of taking one step forward and two steps back if you know what I mean. It’s hard to hold out hope of Sam and Cait ever coming out publicly when there’s interviews and books filled with the narrative.

Dear Valentine's Day Anon,

You start with a lie. You are not reading that book. You have read someone else's (dutiful Marple, as always, all hands on deck) choice of salacious/commercial/crappy sentimental passages of a 150 to 200 pages book chock-a-block full with other things. You, therefore, have an F- from me for laziness and naïveté. When you speak about a text, any text (and this, Anon, scarcely is literature), please be honest with yourself and wait until the end. The same way you should never judge a book by its cover, do not judge a book by some excerpts someone picked up in order to show you how desperate the author is to sell it.

Reading is a personal affair. Buy the book. Read it all. And then you'll be qualified to have a grounded opinion. I am not in a hurry to read it and I certainly had no hopes he would give us a single ounce of his reality or truth in a commercial companion to a TV show, as this book clearly is.

Then, there's also that: it is a ghostwritten book and not a very good one. Travel books are also always rife with false self-references and I hope, for one, you do not believe there is anything remotely objective in Marco Polo's Book of the Marvels of the World (some say he never got where he told all the Western World he did!). And if Marco Polo himself lied shamelessly, why wouldn't SRH do exactly the same, for the needs of a scantily cobbled show where he is playing the decoratively fit clown along his older, wiser, nerdy companion?

I was shown the reactions to those dutifully poisonous posts. A mob, cackling and the host gleefully throwing gasoline on that fire (but oh, no: she is not a hater - my foot she isn't). The only comment that truly broke my heart, Anon, is this one:

What a terrible person must the woman who wrote that be! What a horrible, empty life she must have! Please, for the name of everything holy, leave Chrissie Heughan out of your putrid pettiness! She raised her boys by herself and with very little. Whoever wrote this comment should really, really be ashamed of herself. She can even say whatever she wants about SRH, but she should leave his family out of her hatred. Not a single woman in that thread corrected or challenged her. Not. A. Single. One.

You also tell me you are tired with the tango. I also think no real shipper could fall, by now, for these tired tricks. And if you do believe the interviews and books more than they should be, you are the perfect fodder for those interviews and books that can and should be questioned, as anything else in this strange story is critically questioned every single day.

So you see, Anon, I will perhaps be interested in your grounded opinion the day you will come back after reading the whole book, not Marple's Reader Digest version. If anything, your uninformed, gluttonous curiosity backfired. Unless you came here to spread the holy shite on this doorknob, too. But that is your problem, Anon. Not mine.